折翼の天使

I've MoVeD!!!

2006-11-14T01:54:00.000+08:00

I'VE MOVED!!!
I'm finally moving to wordpress, and the link is as follow:
http://nailus.wordpress.com

Do you know...

2006-10-26T23:37:00.000+08:00

hah..
it's one of my do-you-know time once again..
Do you know that you can actually cry in your sleep?

Something that will leave its imprint in my life has happened, I'm still trying to cope with the after-effect, and I did realise something. It IS possible to cry while sleeping. At least I did. It's a dream, and damn it, I slept for barely four hours and I can't remember my dreams..

Second question, How do you know that you cried???
1. when you wake up and your eyes hurt like hell
2. your eyes can barely open without feeling the pain
3. you lift your hands to touch your face and you find that they are kinda wet, tear-streaked
4. you find that there is a little patch that is wet, not your saliva but your tears

That's enough, I guess..I will be blogging lesser now that I really have no idea what my life is made up of..Gotta reorganize

一下下

2006-10-23T16:11:00.000+08:00

一下下..就多一下下

Announcement

2006-10-20T22:55:00.000+08:00

I just remove my tagboard today, so right now I'm trying to get use to no taggy..
no new updates for the time being 'cause:
no blogging = no life
no life = no energey
no energy = no time
so no time = no blogging

tata.. ('-^)

wahahaha

2006-10-19T15:35:00.000+08:00

kawaii neh~~

fallen angel

2006-10-10T09:01:00.000+08:00

a heart, torn and battered, stays hidden behind the mask of happiness and blissfulness, hoping to be isolated so that it would not have another chance to be hurt again... ...

VIVACIOUS!!!

2006-09-22T23:17:00.000+08:00

I had a vivacious 16 Sept..
It's the very first Singapore Big Bike Festival on that day..
My crazy day started in the late morning, Baby came to pick me up, and we went to meet up with some of the ESR buddies at East Coast MacDonald..
After that, the group of us proseeded to meet the SBF S4 riders at Kallang KFC.
When all have arrived, the group of us proceeded to Clark Quay in the form of a convoy..
(They never fail to look so G~R~A~N~D when travelling in convoy)
There's quite a number of activities at the bike fest, there's even a biker babes competition..
But in my opinion, the promoters look hotter than the babes..
Anyway, we didn't stay there that long either. We proceeded to a coffee shop some where near Md Sultan (if I'm not wrong) for an early dinner..

One more thing that I definitely cannot exclude is that the Harley-Davidson is one of the organisers. They came in a convoy as well, and they rode their bikes past the stage front, parading their bikes. I even saw the very cute Harley-Davidson... It'a those with super high handle bar..So funny lor!! I think you can even hang your clothes on the riders arm to sun them dry lor...

Baby and I went to his place to rest for a while before we continue this vivacious night out. At about 9pm, we went out to meet a small group of the ESR, and proceeded to the 2nd link for petrol. After that, we had supper at Malaysia, and the time is about 11pm plus. We reached Singapore at about 12am plus, coming to 1am, and we joined the rest of the ESR at Gotham Penthouse.

Sadly, I didn't take any pictures as my camera phone is too lousy...

LOST~

2006-09-15T12:42:00.000+08:00

I felt so lost right now...
I just check my results in the office this morning, then I spend my next 30min crying. I failed 1 module. I just can't seem to stop the tears from flowing. I tried very hard, but it still took me 30 min before I actually calm down.Felt like going home...I can't concentrate on what I'm supposed to do~
FREAKS!!!

When man falls, the angels guide them..
But when angels all, who will be there to guide them...

shackled!!!

2006-09-03T18:04:00.000+08:00

I can almost feel Monday creeping towards me..
I hate that kinda feeling.. I haven't been blogging because blogger hasn't exactly been cooperative, I know there's a beta versiuon, but I'm just plain lazy to shift it over... Just wanna blog a little something about yesterday, 2 September. It's my younger sister's birthday, she's more lovable after she broke up with the hypocrite(YZ), so I wanna wish her HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
It's also ESR's 1 year old birthday, we had a little gathering, about 26 bikes. Programs for the evening, starts with a little speech from the bossman, then viewing of a 15 minutes video clip done by the ESR brothers. (They are such hidden talents.) After that, went for a ride in convoy. I like the idea of travelling in a convoy. Looks kinda grand to me, just my personal opinion. Destination is the war memorial, had a photo shoot out, panned to go Marina South Pier but it's getting late and everyone's getting hungry, so proceeded tO KTM for dinner cum supper. We had a little too many people, so we took about 7 tables(3 round tables, 4 long rectangular tables).
After our makan session, we were divided into 2 groups. First group, 11 bikes, went to Malaysia via 2nd link for fuel, Baby and I joined them. I reached home about 3.20am, Baby reached home about 15 minutes later. No idea what speed he travelled at. Second group went to party world for some crazy singing session, I think they booked the room till 6am in the morning. I would like to join them, but kinda tired after reaching Singapore, so went home.

I don't think I'll be uploading much pictures, so I'll apologise about that. Blame blogger if you insist, 'cause they are indeed very uncooperative.
I'm signing off now, gotta get more rest for my work tomorrow, hectic work life...
*sigh~~~

Special

2006-08-21T23:13:00.000+08:00

It's my birthday today, so I decided to make an exception, and BLOG~
Its sad that I had to go to school to take my papers on my birthday but its ok...I've received birthday wishes from friends and family through the day..
I didn't manage to spend my day with Baby as I still need to study for my BLAW paper, which is at 9am tommorrow (DuhzZ)
Anyway, I got a gift from Baby on Sunday morning and here are the pictures:

I rearranged them in a vase later in the evening..

NOW!!!

2006-08-03T11:51:00.000+08:00

OMG~I felt like dying.I'm so stuck in school!!!
I wanna blog, but all the pictures are at home, Im using the school desktop that has got nothing in it, even my messenger display pictures different, I'm trying so hard to standardize my display picture at school but it dosen't seem to be working. Freaks!! I'm just rattling on and on, non-stop. That's bad~

Yesterday, Rachel, Syahriah, Samuel Yeo, Hakim and me went over to Joey's place to finish up the stupid IES web thingy. In the end, nothing much was done as most of the problems were in the BAWEB server and not the local host. In order to access the BAWEB server, the first criteria is that you have to be in school. BUT we were being chased out by four freaking malay security guards that I don't give a damn basically. I didn't remember being chased out in any event where my group and I stayed till 12 midnight. I've got pictures of them sleeping at Joey's place. Special thanks to Rachel, the photographer because my camera phone is too noisy and I didn't wanna disturb anyone that is already on cloud nine. I'm so so so so tired~ I haven't had a proper sleep since I woke up yesterday morning.. Felt like a zombie, with a bad hair day, bad mood, bad start with an accusing phone call and so on. Somebody just talk to me!!!

Quick Updates

2006-07-30T06:16:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, I went to Pulau Ubin for some cycling and games, now I'm heading to Mersing of Malaysia for breakfast. Isn't fun?!?! Haha~ I rally had a lot of fun this weekend. For more details, I'll fill them in after I return from my trip.
I'm so happy~~~

Shame

2006-07-28T10:08:00.000+08:00

Just now, I just saw the most disgusting thing ever. The bully is actually asking help from the victim. Can anyone believe it?!?! I really wanna laugh out loud, real loud. It's so dusgusting, the moment they needed help, they would act as though you are their friend. When they no longer need you to finish up their projects, they would outcast you. *SNORTS*

My ITP

2006-07-27T09:42:00.000+08:00

SobZ*~ My ITP company is out.. The company is called Oak Systems Pte Ltd, it is situated at stanley street. After checking it up at streetdirectory.com, I still have no idea where is the exact location. Haiz~
I think I'm basically announcing it to the whole world about my ITP company. So far, I have not known anyone that has been posted to the same company as me. I'm panicking. My class has been posted everywhere... There are those posted to SimLim, M1, and a number of I-don't-know-what company. But basically, they are mostly IT companies.

school~

2006-07-26T14:24:00.000+08:00

OMG.. I think I'm rotting already. I came all the way from my home to attend one IT lecture. The reason that I went to this lecture is because the lecturer is my tutor and he is a super nice guy. He is so nice that I think half the class people are like sorta bullying him. Last week, when I went for hihs lecture, there were only seven people in the lecture hall. SEVEN!!! Canm anyone imagine that?!?! Today, I went to the lecture, there were twelve. A pathetic TWELVE, and that includes me. Right now, I'm just rotting in one of the empty classrooms in block 72, waiting or time to pass.. Haiz~ So sad lohz, the whole lecture hall, I'm the only one from my class.. *sad*

100!!

2006-07-25T20:33:00.000+08:00

HaHa.. This is my first hundred post since I started blogging in December last year. I've got so much to write about, was wondering of if I should separate them, or just join them all into one. I guess I'll just continue from wher I left in the previous post. On 22 July, Saturday, I went to catch a movie with my boi and a few of his friends. We watched The World's Fastest Indian. Here is the synopsis:
In `60s New Zealand, at the bottom of the world, Burt Munro takes a 1920 Indian motorcycle and, delightfully without resources other than his own obsession and a Kiwi #8 wire mentality, spends his retirement rebuilding the bike and following his dream to go to Speed Week at Salt Lake in Utah. Under funded, without the support of a team and against all the odds he not only makes it to Bonneville, he sets a national land speed record, not once, but again and again.

My boi thinks that the show is not too bad, just a little draggy. But in my opinion, I think that the man in the show is strong. I'm not referring to him physically, but his strong determination, will, beliefs and his confidence. I think the man in the show, Burt, is one that evryone should look up to. He's great~ I mean, he's old physically but young in the heart, he's got a close brother who died right in front of his eyes, he had heart problems, he had financial problems, but he overcome all the obstacles. I admire his spirit, his belief, his determination and everything. Thumbz up to Burt!! He broke the records for the following nine years!!

Number 99

2006-07-22T20:00:00.000+08:00

This is only my ninty-nine posts. Its finally reaching a hundred..I wonder how long can I keep this as I'm a super duper lazy blogger..So many things have happened over the past one week and I have no idea where to start from. IF I were to start from the beginning, I think its gonna take days for me to finish my blogging. I need to settle down and sort out my thoughts first, one thing for sure is that I'm very happy that my last formal presentation is over, but there's still a big one waving at me right up ahead. In addition, there's still an ERP pratical test, I have no idea how that freaking thing work, but I swear I'll make myself learn it and pass it. I mention that I'm anti-Daryl in my previous post, I said that I'll add in th details, but I decided not to. Why do I even bother to get myself all worked-up over a jerk?!? It's not worth it in any way~ So let's just forget about that, I know very well that the childish idiot will continue with his way, but WHO CARES~ What comes round, goes round. He will get what he deserves. He's treating others in this way, others will treat him in the same way in the future. Let's just leave it to fate. On my part, I'll try my best to forgive him and understand his thinking in the best way I know, but that does not mean that I'll succeed in forgiving him.

Through the week, that idiot in my family keeps giving me trouble. Its not something uncommon, so I think that I'm still able to deal with it and cope pretty well about it. That's about it, TaTa~~

That's it!!

2006-07-20T16:50:00.000+08:00

I hereby announce that I am anti-Daryl!! I finally believe in what I'm seeing.. If I've not seen it for myself, I would not have admitted that such species of human actually exists. This idiot here is almost exactly like that Mr Tomato in the ESR thread. I somehow think that they are related one way or another.. Just another asshole with a stick up his ass..Details will be filled in when my presentation is over.. This is the very first time that I actually announce my dislike on someone else.. I'm so glad that I did.

IT meets creativity

2006-07-18T11:32:00.000+08:00

I like the one that is using it as a cage..so cute and save money oso...

moi blog~

2006-07-17T11:19:00.000+08:00

I guess my blog here looks a little dull in comparison with all the fanciful ones. But hey, this is my blog, so I'll do my way.. Alright, just a quick update, I had a haircut yeswterday, freaked myself out this morning when I walk past my mirror..My boi commented on my hair that I look a little like the Boo-Chan(阿呆) from Crayon Shinchan(蜡笔小新) from a distance.. *diaoz*
This is BooChan~

I have yet to reach a hundred posts despite my 6 month archive..It goes to show that I'm a lazy blogger..
Going to school now, tata people...

Freaking week

2006-07-16T00:53:00.000+08:00

I just had an extraordinarily busy week swtarting from last friday. Over the week, I had lots of projects presentation and deadlines to meet. Ok. I have no idea where to start from already!! In short, its's a disastrous week. I couldn't remember what I have done in the past 7 days, just bits and pieces of it in no exact order.
If I'm not mistaken, our group stayed back in school to do project on Wednesday. From what I remembered, we stayed all the way till 11pm, then at about 8pm+, Samuel and group ordered canadian pizza, and he asked if we wanted. So all of us had pizza as snack, and there's another table having KFC at the same place. By about 9pm, the place is pretty empty and we really did treat it like our home I guess. We walked around with pizza in our mouth and talking when we were chewing on the pizzas. Then Syah and Rach went to get drinks from the vending machine, Vic was there as well, but she didn't stay with us till 11pm. She went back at about 8.45pm as her area was not very safe at night, so we let her leave early. I could have gotten my boi to fetch me, but I didn't. He's not feeling well that night, plus he still need to wake up early the next morning. Not forgetting the part where Carol actually went back to the school just to pass Syah a textbook. HaHa... She has quit school and now, waiting for her degree course to start, which is February next year if not mistaken. She looks so happy~ After Carol came, none of us is in work mode anymore..We just walk around, chatted a little here and there, and we packed up and left after that. The stupid gate is locked, so we just climb over the low railings. It's fun, really. It's been a long time since I did something like this..I used to be jumping over big drains, I even dared some boys to craxl into the big drain with any lights!! HaHA, of course I did, but didn't manage to walk till the end of the drain when I was young..I'm one crazy little fellow, HaHa...
Alright, my eyes are hurting, my head is aching, my back and my feet, basically my aching everywhere..Gotta go now, get some rest and continue on my IS case study..Kinda worried that the guys will not do anything...

what do you see?

2006-07-13T00:51:00.000+08:00

What do you see?

One teacher said, "I felt like they were all moving.....but
slowly, kinda like, they were breathing."

The picture attached are used to test the level of stress
a person can handle.

The slower the picture move, the better your ability
of handling stress.

Alleged criminals that were tested see them spinning
around madly; however, senior citizens and kids see
them standing still.

None of the image are animated -- they are perfectly still

"The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing."

family?!?! what a joke..

2006-07-11T09:18:00.000+08:00

Don't ever mention all the family ties and stuff like that. They are UGLY!!! All these family stuff are just bullshit!!!Now I"m the butt if joke..heh
The ones that put me down are these so-called family!!! I'm so absolutely freaked out!! Because of all these family, I missed my deadlines because I'm not even at home to submit them.. Because of these family, I've got no time for my own studies.. Because of these family, I hardly have time for friends of my own..Because of these family, I'm always studying and working on my projects at the unearthly hours like 3am!! Why that hour is because, eveyone's asleep!! That's when I can do my work!!! So can someone tell me what is family?!?!? I have totally no idea!!! All these family thingy all driving me crazy!! I've got no one.. ABSOLUTELY NO ONE TO CALL FAMILY!!!
All thanks to THEM that my life ios in such a mess~
CAN SOMEBODY JUST KILL ME!!! I'M WILLING TO PAY YOU~~~

cry me a river

2006-07-09T16:59:00.000+08:00

Now, I'm at home with me, myself and I..Oh, and NOBODY..
Facing the ~~stupid~~ computer and the ~~idiotic~~ e-business website and a blaringly loud radio, listening to all the ~~sickeningly~~ sad songs because the rain out there relates to them..

my colour now is grey, so I'm using grey..

YooHoo~~

2006-07-07T23:07:00.000+08:00

I pass my BLAW~
I pass my BLAW~
I pass my BLAW~
I pass my BLAW~

OK, I felt as though I'm on cloud 9 right now, ( breath in, breath out, breath in, breath out) I bit stoned, I little dazed, I little.. ermm.. I don't know!! Good gracious~ I only know that when I was sitting for the paper, I was like "Freaks!! I can't cough out what-ever that I've memorised" and "Good gracious~ Did I just fell asleep??? Why my paper got drawings siaz??". I'm so freaked out.. OK, conclusion: I'm so happy

*I've got myself a pair of glasses, stay tuned for more of the nerdy pictures.

BaBieszZ..

2006-07-06T14:10:00.000+08:00

Last but not least, is Baby Faye from ermm.. the ESR family?? Afterall, her Daddy'is part of the big ESR family..

She's adorable.. At one point of time, its just me staring at her and she staring at me..No idea what she's looking at, but I know I'm just looking at her..

P.S I'm supposed to be doing my 3000 words report, but due to renovation works that is going on in the apartment below mine, I can't concentrate on doing anything at all..

BaBieszZ..

2006-07-06T13:53:00.000+08:00

PICTURE BLOGGING!!
Here's my favourite part.. I like to look at blogs with lots and lots of pictures.. But I'll separate them accodring to categories or several entries..

He's cute, aren't he?? I carried him the other day.. HaHa~ When I told him "come baby, jie jie bao bao.." he jump into my arms.. *victory to me

Up next is Yaxuan, she's Anna newborn daughter..

She's so friendly, can even open her eyes and wave hi to the camera..

Terrible Sunday

2006-07-05T23:28:00.000+08:00

I just realize that I'm in no mood to blog for the past few days..Haven't been myself for the past few days..Perhaps I shall start from Sunday, the day that spoil half my week..
On Sunday, I woke up feeling happy because I working day is over, and that I'm having my favourite dance lesson in a few hours time..But something I hated happened..That idiot in my family (referring to my turning 21 brother) tried to pick up a fight early on a sunday morning, spoiler..If just pick up fights, I'm fine. What disgust me more is that he denied the comtributions that I've made to the family, he denied the help that I have made to my mum AND the family, he criticized me, he simply shoot off without going through his bloody brain!! I am kind enough to not fight with him and just walk away..But the funny thing is that, he thinks that I'm admitting defeat when I walk away..For heaven's sake, I'm being so gentlemenly when in the first place I am NOT A GENTLEMEN!!! I'm trying to keep the peace of the family on a sunny Sunday, and there the destroyer is flauting around, thinking that he's won.. But anyway, the family thought that I was in the wrong when I clam my mouth shut. I know what is gonna happen if I were to continue to fight for my innocence, so I left the situation as it is and simply walk away. Then everyone started blaming me for starting the fight!! OH MY GOD~ That is the most absurd thing that I've ever heard~ I help them, I spare a thought for them, I contribute my own pay for them, and this is what I get in return... Then I guess god is really not fair to me at all.. At that moment, I could feel tears welling up, so I went straight into my room, shut my door, get prepared for my lessons, controlling my tears and not let them fall, all at the same time. Then i went out of the room and swallowed my breakfast. I felt terrible the whole afternoon as I have a gastric in weak condition, I tried to keep my mood up as I am meeting my boi. The dance lesson and my boi did lift up my mood a little, but I didn't get to spend the whole day with my boi. He's meeting the ESR kaki to go to a birthday party, although I longed for his company, I did not ask him to skip the party and stay by my side. Its not being fair to him afterall.. He volunteered to send me home, but I insisted on taing a bus home on my own, so he sent me to the bus stop. At the bus-stop, he brought up the morning incident that spoil my day, my firewall went down the drain.. I started to tear even before I knew it. I could have forgotten the whole matter after the bus trip if he hadn't brought it up..but he still did. When I realized that I couldn't stop the tears from flowing, I chased him away. Throughout the journey, the tears just keep rolling down my cheeks, and I started blaming the air-conditioning, the air quality, the lights, basically everything! Obviously I knew its just me, I took the bus from AMK, past by my place, to Clementi and from Clementi back to my place. I had wanted to go up Mt Faber initially, but as my bag is pretty heavy, I drop the idea.. I;m already quite shackled by all the tearing that doesn't seem to stop. I simply don't understand where does all the tears comew from. As I look out of the bus, I kept seeing fresh tears making their way out of the corner of my eyes from the reflection. Perhaps the tears are all the reason required to keep people away from sitting near me. Throughout the whole back and fro journey, the seats behind, beside and in front of me are all empty..I'm having my contact lenses on, so at the end of the day, my eyes hurts like mad. The pain drives me crazy!! I told nobody about it, but I guess its a little eye infection, I'm quite sick for the next two days.. I keep telling myself that I'm a survivor~ I'm a survivor~ and that nothing can bring me down~ I managed to keep my tears to myself after I got home at about 9pm+ ( I was at the AMK bus-stop at 5pm+). But all the tears ran free once again when I was on my bed that night. I woke up the next day with puffy, red eyes and a splitting headache..

That was only Sunday, but I couldn't remember much for the next few days.. Only someone from Zorpia offering me money to have sex with him.. Being me, I turned it down.. God knows, I might go to him, but not when I'm perfectly sane though..HaHaHaHa~~

holy shit!!

2006-06-29T13:38:00.000+08:00

I just failed my first paper, blardy hell..
Funny thing is that I totally misread the question, according to the comment left by the marker. I must be sleeping during the paper lahz!! The marker did not mark, just a comment. Nice work huh~ I wrote 1 freaking full page of trash!!!
Serves me right for not sleeping~

Presentation

2006-06-28T00:06:00.000+08:00

I had my first presentation after the break. HOoo~ It's nerve wrecking.. I got tongue-tied in the middle of my slide and started jumping around the points, i confused my audience, confused my groupmates, shocked myself, but got an A in the end.
I think this is my worst presentation suit I've been in ever.. The combination is oversized jeans, oversized long sleeves blouse, heels and messy hair. Overall, I hate my day!!!

That's it, I need some rest now. Supposed to do something about my BLAW, but no mood, no strength, no motivation. Only source of energy just ignored me and hang up on me. Dunno what I doing now oso. FOrgot what I wanna say. Misty eyes. Frosty brain. Cold encolsing me. Freezing fingers. Water droplets on my cheeks. God noes what happen to me.

haiz~~~~~~

2006-06-27T02:35:00.000+08:00

Current statues report: Working on DCI for presentation tomorrow, munching on my Apollo strawberry stick wafer (yum yum), surfing around for jokes as a destress tool, playing around with the post-it note pad on my lappy desktop..
Other activities: waiting for pigs to fly, for horse to drop from the sky, for rabbit to starting walking, for cows to start having chalets and for the lion to start grazing on the grazz... ...
*I'm nutz, beware and stay away. I might decide to put you with the tigers and see of the tigers will scream 'EEeeKKkks' at you instead of roar at you anot.

Arh~~Nice day..

2006-06-26T15:37:00.000+08:00

Current statues, blogging in the middle of class, trying to get down to serious work. Just came back from chalet with the ESRs, still on holiday mood. I'm gonna get the pictures of the chalet soon, but not now. Talking war and peace in class. Craps...

Look at my Hammy

2006-06-23T00:13:00.000+08:00

It's been hiding in that little house ever since my brother bought it for him. So lazy..I hardly see my hammy any more~

sick sick sick...

2006-06-21T15:06:00.000+08:00

oooOOHHhh~~ I hate the way I spend most of my holidays..Why in heaven's name that they are treating me so shabbily?? Why am I always sick when I'm having my holidays?? I had planned a clubbing trip last Wednesday, thanks to the fever!!! I cancelled it.. FREAKS!!! This time, I guess I won't get to go as well, I'm having a terrible headache, so bad that I think my brains are not exactly functioning much as well.. But at the very least, I got some stuff that requires no brain work. I've just sweep the floor, mop the floor, done the dishes, dry the laundry.. I sound like a maid -_- ~~

lame~~

2006-06-20T13:24:00.000+08:00

Picturesz..

2006-06-19T15:08:00.000+08:00

hmm..i got this from Carmen's blog..
Just realize that I have yet to update on my links..I think its just me, being lazy..

PIcturesz..

2006-06-19T15:05:00.000+08:00

So sweet..

2006-06-19T13:32:00.000+08:00

Just the other day, I tune into the radio and I heard a sweet little conversation between two DJ. I have got no idea what station is that, but its sweet.

Two DJ, Boy & Gal:
Gal: If your gal ask you to express your love in the center of the world, what would you do?
Boy: I would walk up to her and whisper into her ear.
Gal: ??? Why?
Boy: Because she is the world to me, and it wouldnt be complete without her being in it..

It's in chinese, it sounded so sweet when I heard it..If my boi would say something like that.. But having known him inside out, it's not likely, and I like him the way he is..Now..

Finally~~

2006-06-18T16:59:00.000+08:00

I'm finally getting one off day aftre working like 45 hours for one whole week. What really makes me uneasy is that those ladies there, like to take MC or take urgent leave when I'm there. FREAK IT OUT!!!They even got the cheek to ask me to extend my hours because they are short-handed. I don't mind working extra, but the thing is that they refuse to sign it as OT for me. I bear a freakingly deep grudge against them. I remembered the time where they are suppose to sign it as OT for me, ended up as me being late and cut away. So I did an hour plus of free work for them with absolutely nothing in return. OH! I've got something, I got myself a bad name in return. That's so nice...

... ...

2006-06-17T01:50:00.000+08:00

Can that be a title as well?!?!? *heh
I hate myself for being so tearful..
I hate myself for crying over nothing..
I hate the me I see in the mirror..
I hate the me that crys for you..
I hate crying.. but why am I alwayz doing the thing that I hated most?
I haven't got the answer. Anyone has the answer?
Can someone please enlighten me?

Thank You For Your Time

2006-06-16T23:29:00.000+08:00

A young man learns what's most important in life from the guy next door.

It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls, career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think
about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could stop him.

Over the phone, his mother told him, "Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday."

Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days.

"Jack, did you hear me?"

"Oh sorry, Mom. Yes, I heard you. It' s been so long since I thought of him. I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago," Jack said.

"Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it," Mom told him.

"I loved that old house he lived in," Jack said.

"You know, Jack, after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man's influence in your life," she said.

"He's the one who taught me carpentry," he said. "I wouldn't be in this business if it weren't for him. He spent a lot of time teaching me things he thought were important...Mom, I'll be there for the funeral," Jack said.

As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown. Mr. Belser's funeral was small and uneventful. He had no children of his own, and most of his relatives had passed away.

The night before he had to return home, Jack and his Mom stopped by to see the old house next door one more time. Standing in the doorway, Jack paused for a moment. It was like crossing over into another dimension, a leap through space and time. The house was exactly as he remembered. Every step held memories. Every picture, every piece of furniture....Jack stopped suddenly.

"What's wrong, Jack?" his Mom asked.

"The box is gone," he said.

"What box?" Mom asked.

"There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I must have asked him a thousand times what was inside. All he'd ever tell me was the
thing I value most," Jack said. It was gone. Everything about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box. He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it.

"Now I'll never know what was so valuable to him," Jack said. "I better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom."

It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died. Returning home from work one day Jack disc overed a note in his mailbox. "Signature required on a package. No one at home. Please stop by the main post office within the next three days," the note
read.

Early the next day Jack retrieved the package. The small box was old and looked like it had been mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention. "Mr. Harold Belser" it read.

Jack took the box out to his car and ripped open the package. There inside was the gold box and an envelope. Jack's hands shook as he read the note inside. "Upon my death, please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I
valued most in my life."

A small key was taped to the letter. His heart racing, as tears filling his eyes,! Jack carefully unlocked the box. There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch. Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover. Inside he found these words engraved: "Jack, Thanks for your time! - Harold Belser."

"The thing he valued most...was...my time."

Jack held the watch for a few minutes, then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next two days. "Why?" Janet, his assistant asked.

"I need some time to spend with my son," he said.
"Oh, by the way, Janet...thanks for your time!"

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away,"

Think about this. You may not realize it, but it's 100% true.

1. At least 2 people in this world love you so much that they would die for you.

2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.

3. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.

4. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.

5. You mean the world to someone.

6. If not for you, someone may not be living.

7. You are special and unique.

8. When you think you have no chance of getting what you want, you probably won't get it, but if you trust God to do what's best, and wait on His time, sooner or later, you will get it or something better.

9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good can still come from it.

10. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look; you most likely turned your back on the world.

11. Someone that you don't even know exists, loves you.

12. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.

13. Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will feel much better when they know and you'll both be happy.

14. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that they are great.

If you send this letter to all the people you care about, you will certainly righten someone's day and might change their perspective on life... for the better.

I got this in an email, I thought it's pretty nice.. People in this little island are getting more nasty by the day, perhaps by the minute.. I can only smile. I am not that kinda magnanimous, I can't forgive and forget about everything. I am a quite short tempered person. And pretty paranoid too. I don't quite like myself. I don't like the me now. I think I look so fake. I think I'm the worst kind of human alive. I even think that I'm a hypocrite at times. I've gotta learn to love myself... ...

我让你走了

2006-06-14T23:32:00.000+08:00

I believe...

2006-06-12T23:29:00.000+08:00

the saying that says What Comes Round Goes Round
The reason that I'm saying this is because I am seeing it happen, right in the family line, not my family though. Let's start with the characters in the story, A shall be the relative, B is A's daughter, C is A's son, B and C are siblings, D is A's ex-husband(they are divorced).
Time check now, its 11.30pm, and I shall begin...
A used to be a very nasty person. She takes advantage of everyone in the family, espacially the siblings. A had a daughter and a son. Being overly protective whenever t the son is concern, C has never held any job before. On the other hand, B is an agent, but I'm not gonna say what kinda agent is she(deals with bug money). Previously, the house expenses are controlled by C, the most doted child. But something happen, B became the head of the household. Although A did not like the situation, she had no say about it as she is getting older. Ever since B took over the household, things have changed. Right now, A is like a kid, getting pocket money. When A spends her money too fast, B will question her.
There's still so much more to tell.. I felt my eyes feeling warm when I'm asking my mum about this matter. B has even manipulated A into selling their flat and occupying the flat that originally belongs to D. I really don't know how to continue anymore!!! B has even chased out her aunt to live with C, when C is jobless and can barely keep himself alive. The aunt us very sickly and she can barely see properly due to her deteriorating illness. She is almost blind, and she's picking cardboard boxes to earn a living. She's rhe most innocent party in this story. B is leaving her aside as she has lost her value. Right now, I believe that karma will befall on her, sooner or later. She will reap what she sow, I strongly believe...

me = crazy

2006-06-11T23:29:00.000+08:00

See the dates of my last few posts?? I'm posting and blogging like nobody's business..Well anyway, I think it's because I've finish my common test, and now I'm using my own unique way to destress.. The world cup is here, my boi is a big fan, I know nutz about soccer, so I don't spoil his mood by making remarks on the sport.. Just like if he make remarks on my dance, I'll be mad as well.. By the way, my boi went to Ministry of Sound(MOS) with his friends on Saturday night. I stole a picture from their album:

This are only the guys, I'm not posting the girls due to safety purposes. God knows what people might do when they see those girls on the streets. But I think guys are fine, they so big already, sure can take care of themselves.. *smilez*

Just a Music Video

2006-06-11T04:17:00.000+08:00

It;s just an MV that i used to like very much..

Reflection

2006-06-11T03:35:00.000+08:00

This is something that I've found on deviantart, darren is the creator..

penguins..

2006-06-11T01:16:00.000+08:00

I just finish watching March of the Penguins..
I don't know what to say.. I feel so, so confused.. The daddy penguin protects the baby while the mummy hunts for food, whent he mummy penguin comes back, the daddy goes.. It's a routine for every seasonal change. But reality is equal to crualty, on those trips, sometimes the mummy got hunted by other sea creatures like the sea lion, or the daddy, being unable to with stand those snow storms, fall into a deep sleep and never get a chance to wake up again. For those babies, if the parent fail to keep them warm enough, they will freeze to death.. It's such a cruel cycle.. If those baby penguins have no parent to protect them, some flying creatures, which I think is a vulture, will swop down and eat them. My heart went out to them when I was watching the show just now. This show has been with me for a very long time, but I haven't got time to watch it. Perhaps I should say that, I did not have the courage to watch it till today. Just as I expected, my eyes were moist half way through the show. OOoohHHhh~ Don't I just hate myself for being so.. *growlzz

HAMMY~~~

2006-06-10T23:30:00.000+08:00

I got my hammy~
I got my hammy~
I used to have 3 generations of hammy under my roof, but one fine morning, they just disappear.. That happen when I was very young. Nobody wanted to tell me what happen to all my hammies, makes me so sad, I even pray for my hammies, hoping that they are fine..No stray cats will bully them, or bite them, then let them find for themselves..

*more pictures will be up when I manage to catch the most hamsome moment of this little idol

B~O~R~E~D~O~M

2006-06-09T13:51:00.000+08:00

Quick update

2006-06-08T19:45:00.000+08:00

OK, I had my last paper today, was a killer, one thing for sure is that I'm not like ly to pass my paper today. Reason being, I didn't actually study, just browsing the notes. I almost burn resort to burning them and drink it down. But the stupid notes are sooo WORDY.. I can't stand looking at so many words at one go..
Later when I'm free, I'll take a picture of that notes and show..

I WANT THOSE JERKS DEAD!!!

2006-06-06T22:54:00.000+08:00

This particular post chould have been up last night, but due to unforeseen circumstances(stoopid blogger down again), the post has been deleted. I shall repeat what I had written in the supposedly-up-by-yesterday post. Yesterday, I started my post with tons of the 'F' word, 'cause I'm simply fuming mad in blazing fire, you can literally feel the scorching flames. Some agents from those insurance company tricked my uncle into signing 1 document, and those rodents didn't even let my uncle see what he is signing for. Those rodents are from the company with a round logo, some hills or mountains int he centre, and has 3 red alphabets..
I can't stand the way those rodents do their work, SEE!! All trouble boils down to money. Just 1 signature that my uncle signed, the rodents made about three policy with his signature. In addition, my uncle DID NOT receive any printed documents untill a letter was sent to him, telling him that his investment has lost some money that my uncle became aware of the matter. This is because, he DID NOT, I repeat myself, DID NOT agree to use his money to do any investment as yet. Not only that, those rodents even used his signature to terminate all the policy and investments my uncle ahd with another company. That's despicable!!! And they even transfered all this money from his CPF to the company!!! This is getting out of hand, in my personal opinion.
At that moment of time, I had a list of words to describe these rodents, they are: DESPICABLE, LOW-DOWN, UNCRUPULOUS, DISHONEST, SLY, CUNNING, EVIL, SCHEMING, WICKED, UNETHICAL, FRAUDULENT, UNDERHANDED, DISHONOURABLE, TREACHEROUS, ROGUISH, RASCALLY, VILLAINOUS, SCOUNDRELLY, ROTTEN, DIRTY, UNTRUSTWORTHY, RUTHLESS, LOATHSOME, HORRIBLE, BASTARD, CHEAP, BEASTLY, DETESTABLE, WRETCHED, BEGGEARLY, DESPISABLE, ATROCIOUS, CURSED, CUSSED, DAMNED, INCORRIGIBLE, PESKY

my list is not complete though, but I guess GOD will blast them when the time comes. Justice shall prevail at the crucial moment. Unless the evil is on their side, then I shall curse them to burn in HELL and be reincarnated with a stick stuck up their arse..

*Not my style to be so long-winded in my entries, but some things are better said than kept in the heart..

BITCH!!!!

2006-06-04T08:43:00.000+08:00

It's so early in the morning, and tht bitch just pissed me off before my day starts. I hope that she will reap what she sow one fine day, and it better come quick. Real quick, because I'm really losing my patience on her. She's changed for the worse ever since she met that bastard that is previously from her workplace. Thst bastard is a HYPOCRITE!!!! The BITCH even bring that BASTARD home and right into my room just to piss me off. And that skin-thicker-than-elephant bastard will ty to talk to you in whatever means possible. The best part is that he doesn't do it in front of the bitch. He always wait till that bitch is busy with something else before he tries to stike a conversation. So 贱(despicable) right?!? Is there anything you're trying to hide when you strike a conversation with others only when your girlfriend is not around?!?! Smells fishy, isn't it? But whatever the case, she likes to stuck with a liar, they match, that bitch is irresponsible, lazy and doesn't contribute in any way to the family. So might as well be this case, so I do not have to touch on anything of hers.

Bad Quality Indeed...

2006-06-04T01:39:00.000+08:00

I think I'm kinda lost for words..This is one of the very few times that I'm lost for words. I can't find much suitable desciption to tell about the TWO old man with some stick stuck up their asses. Both of them are talking without thinking, both of them talk as though they own the world, both of them reply as though the world owed them billions of dollars, and most importantly, they are both a PAIN IN THE ASS!!!
Things can't get worse when one of them is a big fat liar.. The class can be the witness, (*snorts) lying through his teeth, no wonder he prefers to see us in private.. The other one is no better, he like you, he'll like your work. He don't like you, he will criticize till the very last bit. How can teachers be so irresponsible in their remarks?!? They are suppose to facilitate our learning, not to bring us down!!! OMG, with such a learning environment, it is little wonder that singaporeans can't lift their heads up abroad, or be proud to be a singaporean. I too am ashamed of such people in the society. PREJUDICED

All right now, I do not wish to comment on these kinds jerks anymore, it will end up as an insult to my intelligence if I can't just ignore these low-down creeps(rodents)..

SHOOT!! SCREWED UP!!!

2006-06-02T23:14:00.000+08:00

I've got no wish to blog actually, had a bad day..
screw up my presentation, screw up my tutorial, wanna go to the doctor but he's closed...Conclusion: it's a bad day
Anyway, we took some pictures of the group in FORMAL(which is something I'm not in favour of)!!
I'll blog about the old man with a stick up his ASS and his nonsense..

restrictions...

2006-06-01T07:11:00.000+08:00

I have so many stuff to blog about but i can't.. All thanks to those busybodies, like to read what people write and complain baout it when they can't do as well.. Curse them to burn in hell, feel like shoving a stick up the ass of such people.. If I blog it out, I mgiht be accused of making racism remarks, or sexism remarks, or what-ever they think I fall into, so in order tokeep myself safe, I'll put up a script when I'm free. It's done as one of my module projects.. *hiak hiak* <- evil grins

MoVieSszz

2006-05-30T14:30:00.000+08:00

I think I'm nutz lohz, 2 posts in an hour..
Anyway, in the month of May, I watched 2 movies, PoSeiDon and Over the Hedge.. I had wanted to watch The Da Vinci Code initially, but I never read the book, plus its not my type of show..But those friends of my boi, they are practically movie freaks. They watched Over the Hedge, PoSeiDon(not all of them though), The Da VinCi Code,MIssion Impossible III, and they are catching X-Men: The Last Stand soon.
At this rate, my boi's gonna be broke, 'cause he's always paying for the tickets and I did not pay a single cent. Though it seems quite logical for my boi to pay but I'm still not used to letting my boi pay for almost everything for me. I guess its just me and my silly personality, I used to go dutch when with my ex...It's just my point of view..

I'm blogging(in class)

2006-05-30T14:18:00.000+08:00

I'm finally done with my powerpoint slides, whoa~ It's one big relieve for me.. I did a really silly thing though, I went into THIS forum and started a frenzy to reach page 800th. The next time would be 900th and the grand 1 would be 1000..I'm part of the crazy gang..It's like 5 person on average, clock a total of 15 pages..

That's just part of it, I was down with a mild fever, so I couldn't work with a clear state of mind, then I woke up at 3am to tie up the loose ends of my projects.
I skip lecture for MIS for the very first time today, cannot blame me lahz, too tired mahz, plus my lecturer like to talk, so... ... *smilez*

I WILL SURVIVE!!!

2006-05-29T09:27:00.000+08:00

Haiz..I still lost to the zzZZzz monster i the end, fell asleep in front of my lappy and it went into hibernation mode. Funny thing is, in order to keep me awake, I made myself a bottle of chicken essence, but I fell asleep before it is even ready. As in the drink is cold, so I heated it up. I can't take coffee, my doctor says so. If I take coffee, it's either the coffee that kills me, or he will kill me. Now I shall cheong my projects liao. Just did a count on the projects that have to be done: PROCOMM, WISP, MIS, ERP, DCI, IES & BLAW.. That ALOT sia..*giddy*

Quote

2006-05-29T06:16:00.000+08:00

What does not kill me makes me stronger.
- Fredrich Nietsche

I believe I WILL SURVIVE!!! OMG, the zzZZzz monster is catching me..*gets up and scramble off to hide*

Nice?!?

2006-05-28T19:51:00.000+08:00

HaHa, this is the work done by a group of NP year 3 students. So colourful hor..Can anyone see the link? Yes? No? HaHa..

Cutie~~

2006-05-27T02:23:00.000+08:00

I waited pretty long to coax him into getting pictures..

He's adorable, huggable and kissable..Simply irresistable..

He's getting forgetful..

2006-05-25T12:12:00.000+08:00

We agreed to catch a movie today after his work on Sunday, 21 May 2006, the day I took my assessment for dance. But he remembered nothing about it, only remembering that he's going over to a friend's place tomorrow. So my statues? Isn't it worse than just a friend, to think that I'm even looking forward to this day... ...So STUPID of me.. I kinda dislike his friends now, everytime he's back from activity with them, he'll be too tired to accompany me. He's sometimes too tired to even talk to me.. Do I look like I'm made of plastic?? Do I look like I've got no feelings?? Do I need to bring up the same issue more than once?? In that case, how many times exactly do I have to bring it up?? Here I am, trying to make time for him despite my hectic schedule..(NOTE: I'm in year 3 this year!! I'm doing TONS of projects!!!) And there he is, sleeping away the time I set aside just for him..

Smilez~

2006-05-25T10:16:00.000+08:00

*He's just a kid in the neighbourhood, not mine, though I wish he is..*

Random Updates

2006-05-24T01:26:00.000+08:00

Firstly is the Singapore Idol auditions...
I can't stop laughing, I'm so glad that I'm still alive with the "Campfire in the Moonlight" or the "NONG NONG AGO" song.. Then there's the kungfu hustle thingy and the cowboy stuff.. Loads of craps and lobsters siaz..
Secondly is the advertisement of one of the new shows that is coming up, the show name is called "A Journey Through Life". (I think its the name, its new, not shown yet, just the advertisement.) The funny part is I cried while watching the advertisement. It's about how people , who are physically handicapped, become heroes in a way unique to others. I admired the courage and the will for them to survice. I don't think that I'll be able to survive if I'm like deaf or blind. I felt so fortunate that I can see, can hear, can run around. I'm so useless..
Thirdly is the forum people. I really think that the devils are there to show how angelic the angels are..HaHa..Take for example the starter for this thread. He's that egoistic sonofabitch that has been mentioned in one of my previous post.I evryone on the road is like him, I might have been dead 'NONG NONG AGO~'*Bursts out laughing*

It's from my boi..

2006-05-23T02:10:00.000+08:00

The helmet is mine, my boi bought it just for my use..The dog is here to accompany when he's too busy at work.. The dog's head is of hugable size, but not the body.. HeHe~

It's over..

2006-05-21T21:32:00.000+08:00

Something that I have been anticipating for so long is finally here.. And it is over in a blink of an eye. The practice over the past two months, the shoes that I've bought, the skirt, the top, the accessories and the fees for this examination is showcased in my dance which lasted less than a minute. I'm glad that it's over as I can finally put my full strength on my school, but I'll definitely make it to the 2-dance category in October.. I'm waiting~

can I say I'm pretty fearless?

2006-05-21T10:24:00.000+08:00

I did some of those stuff that I thought was crazy last night. I had a pretty bad day yesterday. Firstly, I have to work at (am in the morning. Then is my dance lesson, it's considered the most enjoyable time of the day, but it's only an hour. Time indeed flies when you're enjoying yourself..
After my lesson, I didn't feel like going hone, reason being I saw someone going towards my place while on my way to my dance lesson. In the end, I walked on and on. Finally deciding on Tekka Mall, since it's just standing right in front of me. To add on, I went there alone. So it looks kinda pathetic..While I was strolling around, spending time, I bought myself something to drink. I lingered around for barely a minute and I decided on it, Venom Ice. It'a not too bad though, just feel kinda weird when I was on the bus.
I purposely took the long way home as I knew it very well that they will still be at my home when I reach home. Just one little bottle of Venom Ice and I'm already red like a lobster. I'm such a loser... Then on the bumpy, long ride home, I felt like puking a nunmerous times. I drank lots of plain water to stop that kinda feeling, doesn't feel too good about it. When I think that I really cannot take that bumpy ride anymore, I just drop off at any stop and rest. I don't even know what stop is that and I just get down, isn't that a brainless action??
If I can think at that time, I would never do something so stupid as this. At the bus stop, I look at the streetlights, they look so pretty... They go dim and bright and dim again, and bright again..HaHa, I guess I'm a little drunk already.. It seems true that when you drink in a happy mood, you don't get drunk so easily.. I was drinking because there was no one there for me..

The next time, I will go for Hooch, thirty-three e, corona, that-dunno-what-tea, and all the beer available. But I really hope that I won't be drinking alone, on the streets like that again. Who knows what might happen if I got drunk and just slept in the streets..HaHa..
*Laughing at myself for my stupidity*

Updates for 17/05/06

2006-05-19T12:39:00.000+08:00

Late entry, but never mind..It's always better to be late than never..
Anyway, 17th May is my boi's birthday, I had a real busy day as well..Firt thing in the morning is 2 make-up lessons from 9AM to 1PM due to the stupid e-learning. After that, I had a break from 1PM to 3PM. During this 2 hours, I went home and leave all unnecessary items at home and get my boi's gift. I bought him a denim jacket from LEE at $100, I was looking for LEVIS' actually, but couldn't find any, so I settled for the 2nd best. Plus I made some marshmellows coated with chocolates(I wonder who has been nibbling on my marshmellows, its left with only half when I return to get it that day...). Then from 3PM to 5PM, I went back to school for lecture. After my lecture, I took a train from Clementi to Tampines. I didn't realize that its actually so far... I thought its pretty near at first, but after I board the train, I counted 21 stops. Then I was like...*Oh God Blasts ME!!Why didn't I check before coming* Throughout the journey, the train was packed, I'm like dozing off, standing.. By the way, the reason I went to Tampines is to get the Tiramisu that my boi has been singing praises about. So after I get his favourite Tiramisu, I took a train donw to Tiong Bahru to mee4t him. At first he wanted to meet at Boon Lay, but I managed to change the location. (HaHa, I'm so proud of myself.) That gives me an excuse not to blog..But I'll still make up for it..1 thing I regret is forgetting to get the pictures of the Tiramisu and his denim. Haiz, blame it on my STM(short term memory)..

LooK aT thIS!!!

2006-05-17T23:36:00.000+08:00

Can anyone believe this?!?! It's from my school website.. HaHa, I can't stop laughing siaz..My little brother can draw better than this siaz.. *Roll on the floor laughing*

I'm reckless...

2006-05-15T23:35:00.000+08:00

I think that if I ever got my license, everyone will shun from me. This is because, I'm not the type that will make blunders in the learning process, but make all sorts of mistakes after I've learnt. Taking riding a bicycle as an example, I practically had no injuries when I was picking up the skill. It was only after I learnt it that I start having accidents. I had only minor bruise when I was learning. After I've learnt it, my bruises increase in number and in size. There's one occasion when I went riding at Pulau Ubin with my friends, then I had a major accidents, considering the injuries sustaine overall. I had scratches on my elbow, kneecap, my hands, my shoulders and a bit on my thighs. As for my friend, she had a big cut on her leg and her kneecap was badly injured. It was bleeding profusely, so I helped her to stop the bleeding with my extremely basic knowledge on first aid. But is did help to stop the bleeding for a while. The bicycle that I knocked into in slightly turned at the handle bar, my own has a little bigger porblem. The wiring for the brake is snapped. Its a downslope journey, and the accident happen at the foot of the slope. I couldn't stop in time, so two casualties reported. I've been cycling for so long, that is the worst accident that I ever had. Because of thie accideent, everyone is discouraging me to get my bike license. They all said that its better for me to get the car license, in that way, less incent people will be hurt. Then I was like: "Diaoz...What the heck lohz..Like that say me..."

Should I or should I not?

2006-05-14T21:54:00.000+08:00

I've been considering this question for a very long time... Should I go and get my license? Or should I just wait for other to pillion/ chauffuer me around? I've been cracking my head on that issue, I had wanted to get my class 3 license initially, but my mind is on class 2b.. In the end, I finally convince myself to get BOTH of them...That's when my biggest problem arise. I haven't got that much money to do so many stuff!! I wanna take salsa, rumba, viennese waltz, swing, jive and so many more.. I wanna get my car license, my 3 bike license adn my wanna get my own tribal kips, then I'll proceed getting a black colour cb400 super four vtec 2, my final destination is haya busa, black oso... Everything is so planned, the only tripping stone blocking my way is money...

URGHZZzzz...
All problem indeed start aith money siaz..

talking about hospitals..

2006-05-12T00:21:00.000+08:00

Actually, I don't really have very much faith and confidence in local hospitals and doctors. I thought that such things only happens in those drama and TV serials, but it has happened. Right here, in my family!! Those so-called doctors made a mistake in diagnosing my grandmother, telling her that she's suffering from cancer and has a tumor in her body. But when they operated, there was nothing there at all!!! Thoses shmeless organisation still has the cheek to charge a few thousand dollars for their mistake!! I don't understand!! I think I'm gonna piclk up more of the law knowledge, so that I can help those that has suffered due to the insufficient experience and knowledge of those doctors. My grandmother DID NOT die from cancer, she died from depression and under-nourishment. She's such a healthy and prominent women. My dad still grieves over her, even after so many years. I was born 1 week after her death. There are people in the neighbourhood that thinks that I am a jinx to her, some thinks that she reincarnated in me. I don't care. This is not the only one, I've got another TWO relatives that has suffered under the so-called advancement of medical science.. That's why I don't like doctors. That's why I have no trust and confidence in them treating my granny, dearest to me. Everytime I recall her holding my hand when I was young, I'll have the very strong urge to cry. She's like a child now, remembering only events that happen a very long time ago. She still thinks that she's in China, she came to Singapore with my grandpa when she was young. I miss her so much~ But I dare not go and visit her, to see her~ I;m afraid~ Right now, I felt moisture in my eyes again..Seeing her in this state, I couldn't bear to let her suffer, yet I can't bear to let her leave me..I felt lumps forming in my throat.. I wonder how long I can take this, I have no idea how many times things like that will happen again..Perhaps its just me being emotional.. ..

OUT TO KILL

2006-05-11T10:20:00.000+08:00

I just wanna kill that idiot taking my class for IES(INTEGRATED E-BUSINESS SYSTEMS
)!!! He's such a pain in the ASS!!! I can't tolerate such arrogant attitude! So wghat if you are a lecturer!HUH!! So what that you are OLD! HUH!! You're more like abusing your power!! FARK THAT BASTARD !! (anyway, I don't think that anyone will wanna fark him, just look at him!! It's good enough to be able to look and not puke!!)
*snorts* OLD MAN IN HIS MENOPAUSE!!!

hmm... ...

2006-05-11T00:58:00.000+08:00

I think when I'm half way through my projects, I'll start building the links and the archives of my blog..Then perhaps I'll insert some music videos and change abit of the layout..Everything's based on maybe. HaHa..
~~||~~||~~||~~
I wanna go shopping!! I wanna go clubbing!! I wanna go KBOX!! I wanna go moovies!! I wanna SLEEP!! I wanna go REDANG!! I wanna go holidays~~

the world wide web has got all kinds of people..

2006-05-10T14:54:00.000+08:00

http://www.singaporebikes.com/forum/index.php?s=f627e2765d26f12d2228d7117013bf77&showtopic=116921

Taking this tread as an example, the treadstarter is such an egositis sonofabitch siaz..I simply can't stand the way he is so bossy about the way he do things. He's always thinking that whatever he do, it's always right. He's so self-centered!!! He simply don't take comments seriously, thinking that the whole world is against him and stuff like that..But with the way he behave, how can anyone evr treat him nice?!? He's taking friends for foes, strangers as danger and I have absolutely no idea how hew had survive this far..

That's all folks..Gotta run and catch my lecture..Good gracious!! I'm late!!!

this is my dream bike

2006-05-09T00:42:00.000+08:00

It has once been my dream bike, it alwayz will be..

I'm feeling so down.. ..

2006-05-08T22:08:00.000+08:00

I was actually planning to help my mum in her little shop today, but I realize that I still have things left undone, I've gotta handle my school work!!!Why can't they be more understanding towards me?!?! Can they stop asking me why am I sleeping late?!?! (I alwayz put their assignments before my own. I try to finish theirs before starting on mine.)Isn't it obvious that I am just trying to help?!?! Why can't they show a little bit more appreciation?!?! If they had realized, I've been helping in the housework day-in-day-out!!! Can't they just treat me betta?!? I'm drained!!! And its just the beginning of the semester!!! I'm already in year 3 I'm very clear that I needed a lot more time than previous years..

All I did just now was ask my younger sister to help my mum in the shop. Her attitude is like I'm asking her to stand in the middle of the road and let a car run over her. So in the end, I'm the baddie who bully my younger siblings. Why do I have to degrade myself(zuo jian zi ji)?!?

I'm going nutzzZZ

2006-05-08T10:21:00.000+08:00

While I was having breakfast just now, my younger brother ran over and starting pointing at stuffs and asking questions. I wasn't paying attention because this is his trick to be late for school, intention is to skip the spelling his class is having early in the morning. Then it happened. He knocked over a bowl of white and sticky stuff. I have no reaction initially, but when I realise that among the white stuff, there lay something black, something that looks liike my phone!!!
OMG~Now my phone is so sticky...So gross...I guess I'm not gonna bring my phone today. I really don't wanna hold that sticky thing near my face..OOooooHHHhhhhh
(my statues for today:MISSING)

black black black

2006-05-08T00:34:00.000+08:00

Your true color is Black!

Your color is black. The color of night. Serene and mysterious, black conjures up images of elegant evening gowns, dashing tuxedos, and gleaming limousines. Traditionally a symbol of success, black also represents power and an uncompromising demand for perfection. Not surprisingly, you tend to set challenging goals for yourself and do whatever it takes to achieve them — your strength of character is second to none. This unfaltering determination, along with your natural elegance, impresses people. But keep in mind that your personality might be intimidating to some. Try to temper your demanding side with a little softness — trust us, it won't kill you. Overall, though, black is the color of professionalism and achievement, which means it's clearly the color for you.

Is that true?? Its up to individual, agree? *smilez*

1 2 3

2006-05-05T17:59:00.000+08:00

I just wanna scream my lungs out and shout my heart out!! I NEED TO DESTRESS!!!

First, when I was on the bus just now, I saw this old lady, in her 70s, boarding the bus. The bus was crowded then, no one gave up their seat to this old lady(I was already standing, so there's nothing I can do). Absolutely NO ONE stood up to give up their seat. What's more, its all those youngsters on the bus, mostly boarded the bus at my school bus stop..Until later, one auntie in her 40s gave up her seat. She was carrying 2 handful of groceries and it looks so heavy..I seriously think that the youngsters should be re-educated. They simply have got no much moral values.

Second thing, I'm really fuming mad when my younger sister change a new phone. I;m not angry that she's changing a new phone. It's just that she changed one that is exactly the same as mine, even the colour is the same. It's not this that make me angry, it's just that I paid for my last three phone myself(including this one) but my younger sister haven't paid for a single phone herself. Even after she started working, she is still not paying for her own stuff. This time, my dad paid for her phone. Don't I hate this?!?! She's so spoilt!!! I hate that!!!
I've been independent since I was 10!!!I've been taking care of other people since I-don't-know-when!!!I've been financially independent ever since I got my first pay!!! I simply don't understand!!! Why are they treating me like that?!?!? What's the problem?!?Is it me?!? If not, who else?!?!
I'm tired~ All I needed is a shoulder to lean on... ...I need a rest...

Thirdly, I'm looking for another job. But all the job offers are $5 per hour. I need to find a job with a higher pay. I wanna rely on nobody!!! I'm not gonna trust anymore.. I just discover that it's actually not easy to trust. You trust, what you get in the end, is an accusation, a blame to shoulder..
Its not worth it. I finally understood that I have only myself to trust, only myself to rely on. Those closest to you may not be those that can be trusted.

Everything seems to be weighing me down. I have no idea how much longer I can take it. I'm like the angel with broken wings, unable to fly, unable to get any help..Totally fallen...

SHOOTS!!

2006-05-02T17:26:00.000+08:00

I tried to blog just now, wrote lots of stuff, then someone shake the table, now everything gone..fed up siaz...

It's nice!!!

2006-04-30T22:08:00.000+08:00

I just watch Take The Lead with my boy..
It's so nice...Super nice..Strongly recommended..I'm still excited..I'm still feeling so high with all the dance moves, the everything in the show..OMG..I think other than latin, I'm gonna take ballroom as well..HaHa..

I don't know what to do...

2006-04-28T23:00:00.000+08:00

Firstly, my original plan was to take part in the 2-dance category of the dancesport exam, but its seems to be unachievable..If I reallly wanna do that, I'll have to do private lesson twice each week...And I'll have to pay another hundred odd bucks, the exam costs 8pounds, which is about SGD$15...So I'm already so broke, its not a possible option..Felt my dream shattered by reality once again...

Secondly, I didn't mean to throw tantrum, I just felt a little frustration rising in me, I have got totally no idea what's wrong with me..I guess I'm just tired..Partly because I'm gonna work from 9am to 10.30pm every Saturday, I obviously know that I no longer enjoy working there with all those low-down rodent, despicable creep, but I've got no choice. I need a job, I need an income, I need to pay for my school textbooks, I need to pay for my school fees, I need some pocket money, I need to keep up with my dance..

my granny..

2006-04-28T00:29:00.000+08:00

Recently. I brought my granny to the doctor as she's having a little cough and a little flu..My heart ache for her~She's a super duper nice lady. She's nice to everyone she meet, she's nice to all the little kids in the neighbourhood, she's nice to all the neighbours, but she's now senile..It breaks my heart to see her like this. I used to love going over to her place after school ends, I used to like satying there till like 10pm at night before going home, I used to stay there when I was very young, before I went to school, I'm her most doted grandchild, but nowadays, when I visit her, she doesn't recognize me...
I just went up to my granny's house two days back, she ask me the same question again. my aunt always answer on my behalf, I always feel an urge to cry whenever she ask that question. I know she didn't want this to happen as well, but I just couldn't help it.. So now, it becomes a routine that after I visit her, I'll hide somewhere and cry a little before proceeding to other stuff.. If ever a fairy comes and ask if I have any wish, I'll definitely ask her to cure my granny.. Even if I have to sacrifice mine in return, I wouldn't consider even for another second..
Right now, I'll tried to keep myself as busy as possible to escape the cruelty of reality.. I can't imagine the day when my granny finally has to leave me..I don't dare to imagine.. I'm not brave enough to even think about it... ...

A New Chapter..(cont'd)

2006-04-25T22:50:00.000+08:00

I think from my current changes, I'm considering a revamp of my wardrobe..But I'll need some financial support on that operation..If I have a sponsor that will pay for all my clothes, I think I'll definitely revamp my wardrobe..Plus, I think I'm gonna change my glasses to plastic frame as I'm currently using metal ones..In that way, I'll look totally nerdy..(which is my intention to ward off those buggers at my workplace)

Now, my new target is to get a distinction for my dance on 21 May 2006..It is a big event for me as I'm a first timer..I'm already down on the nervous system when the event is like a month away..OMG~~How am I gonna cope~~

A New Chapter..

2006-04-24T01:37:00.000+08:00

I've got my new phone, I've got my hair chopped, I've got a new semester ahead of me..HAIZZZzzzz

new phone..
new hair..
new semester..
new classmates..

HAIZzzz

I WANNA WATCH TAKE THE LEAD!!!

2006-04-20T11:47:00.000+08:00

OMG!! Look at this..I wanna watch Take The Lead!!!

I've got it...

2006-04-20T11:17:00.000+08:00

Can you all see it? This is my new phone, I just got it last night..Not bad hor? Eugene help me find 1. See, expert come out only, result also different sia..HaHa..
I just tell him 2 days ago that I'm looking for a new phone because my previous 1 is dying, its got rheumatism(it gets a little crazy on rainy days)..Then I rush down to get the very next day...Fast hor?!?!
Gene, thanks arhz, next time let you play my sonic k? *smiles*

OK, now that I've got a new phone, I'm gonna get my hair cut liaoz..HeHe..
Bye~my hair..Bye~ my freaking Nokia 7200(I spent nearly 1k on that dumb phone)

updates..

2006-04-18T11:43:00.000+08:00

After waking up from my beauty slp of 5 hours, I can tell that I'm now emotionally stable. I wonder why, has it been like that all along or just started recently..I realize that there's a handful of uncles keep coming up to me and talk to me(to me,all above 30s are classified as uncle liaoz)..No matter how I ignore them, they still find something to talk about..Kinda irritating..But never mind, 'cause my job includes smiling at them as well, so I'm just being professional..

Sorry, your appeal has...

2006-04-18T00:00:00.000+08:00

NOT BEEN APPROVED
Haiz..This is the dunno 3rd or 4th time I'm appealing to upload just a pathetic module..Previously, I appeal twice to upload blaw, now I've already appealed twice to upload managing e-commerce...
I thought I don't care..but why are my tears running down my cheeks?!?Why doesn't my tears stop?!?When will my tears stop running?!?It simply doesn't stop..
Of all the time, they called in the midst of my work..The sadder I am, the more I will smile, the broader my smile will become..The more I smile, the more I feel like crying..I hate my job..
Of all days, why today?!?!I feel so pathetic..

Why are you not there when I needed you most? You said you know, I told you about it, but you still are not there..Why am I hugging myself, why ain't you there for me?

wicked driver..

2006-04-16T20:59:00.000+08:00

I've been thinking for a very long time, should I or should I not get my license? I've seen so so so many bu-doh(dim-witted) drivers on the road..Just yesterday, I saw this idiot pulling off stunts, drive BMW 1 somemore..So what they are rich..Just some brainless bastards(or bitch) showing some rattling metal nia mahz..so hao lian for what..Later crash into the curb then I'll be eating popcorn and laugh arhz..So fed up with these people, then last night, I saw a bus stopping in the center lane of the road, then got 1 person lying on the ground, not far from the man is a bicycle..Haiz..life's short, really..
Today, when I was coming home(it's raining monkeys & elephants), then of course any one in the right mind would go by the sheltered way. Then this basTARD stop his car below the shelter. So I'm wet, then this bastard still stare at me, then I look back lohz..It's like, why you stare at me like that, huh..My face got money izzit..Or you got see words on my face huh.. Farking asshole..BRainless bastard..

Period

Next, today at work, the store manager like kenna possessed sia..
This morning, he went back to the store to buy some BBQ chicken. He returned within an hour, went straight to the department and started barking like a mad dog at the staff..For all that I've been told, he's been told to get the chickens for the easter celebration..For all that I've known, he's hen-pecked(one of those with no balls)..So i guessed his master(wife) must have scolded him, that's why he went back to thw store to scold the staff..He even used words like 'bastard'..He's a manager, he scolded in such language, what's worse, he did it IN THE PUBLIC, WHERE ALL CUSTOMERS CAN SEE AND HEAR WHAT IS GOING ON!!! Now, I personally think that HE is the bastard..He's incorrigible, he even wanted to issue warning letter to the staff..He bears grudges, he's using his authority to get back on the staff on personal feud..He's abusing his power..
That is why I never would wanna obey their so-called rules..that's why I never compromise with their request..

This is my favourite song..

2006-04-15T00:12:00.000+08:00

听说南方从来不曾有寂寞
听说在海边世界没有尽头

你哭着告诉我你和他梦想的种种
我会是你雨天的湖泊拥抱你的温柔

好想看你的笑容对离开的他说
你心中那份美丽怎么找都不会再有

静静触摸未来遥远的风有一天你会找回你的梦
幸福是看得透而不是舍不得他的所有

慢慢触摸天空暖暖的火我在这天黑了也不会走
你的快乐除了他还有我永远守候
不要难过

听说冬天叶子瘦了会脸红
听说在天空有迷人的星座

一起去探险吧也许你会喜欢而感动
你沉默的时候我知道你的心还很痛

真想看你的笑容对你的他大声说
你心中那份美丽怎么找都不会再有

if any1 interested to know the translated version, let me know, I'll get it done asap..

I thought...

2006-04-14T23:39:00.000+08:00

I thought I'm healthy, but I'm not..
I thought I'm decisive, but I'm not..
I thought I'm strong, but I'm not..
I thought I could handle problems on my own, but I can't..
I thought I'm financially independent, but I'm not..
I realize that I'm not what I thought I am to be..
I'm a nobody, I can accomplish nothing..
I can mess up even the simplest task, such as studies..
What can I do in the future...
What am I suppose to do after I graduate...
I'm left with only one year now...

There goes, my nerves are not functioning normally again..

giie~where are you~~

2006-04-13T23:57:00.000+08:00

GIIE!!! What have you been doing?? Do you know that peggy has been bad mounthing you all the while that you are not around??? That bitch is really so annoying that the promoters hated her, the jollibean auntie hated her, the sushi auntie hated her as well..Then she always 不懂装懂，假厉害...That's the bad news, the good news is that Doreen is gone!!!(applause)She's been transfered to another outlet, I think they mention bugis if not mistaken...

I just reach home not very long ago, about ten minutes earlier, then my mum was talking to my younger sister.
M(mom): so you go his(YZ,her bf) house again huh..
S(her): umm..
M: then you go there yourself or he come and pick you up
S: go myself
M: then just now he got send you back
S: I come back myself
M: he play enough already dump aside liao huh
S: (quiet) no lah

See that, so stupid also have...haiz.. Really is 来者不拒 arhz
Heck care lahz, so long as he don't come and disturb me can liao..

I really don't like this guy lohz..When he first know my sister, its only like last december, then by january,he's frequently found in my home, what's worse, he's always in my room, even at night..
This is what I've been bearing with all these months...So when he's at my place, I'll avoid it till he left, sometimes he leave only after 11pm..Then I can't go home lohz...When I'm at home, he'll try means and ways to talk to me, we obviously have got absolutely NOTHING in common to talk about..God knows what he's up to..

I don't actually like very long posts, but no choice..haha..

I guess I'm getting out of my mind..

2006-04-13T21:48:00.000+08:00

Alright, I went down to the school today to upload my module again...Hehehe, this time I never use the "realise my mistake and I will work harder" trick liao, this time I use "determination"... Smart right, must change strategy mahz, one don't work, then try another one lohz.. Where there's a will, there's a way..

These are the teams that went for the paintball session with my boi..

ARGHZZZZZzzz~~~~

2006-04-12T20:36:00.000+08:00

ARGHZZZZZZZZZzzzzz!!!!! FARK THAT FARKING SCHOOL FOR THAT!!!~!

This is the don't know how many donkey times I've appeal to upload just 1 stupid module..

URGHZZZZZZZzzzzz

I HATE THEM!!!THEY SUCK BIG TIME!!!
SO THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR STUDYING HARD HUH!?!?!
SO THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR BEING MISS NICE HUH?!?!
SO THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR GOING BY THE BOOKS HUH?!?!

FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!

how's your day today?

2006-04-10T23:07:00.000+08:00

OK..Today, I requested to have a break, I'm really really tired already, I slept half my day away..I don;t know what I have been doing, I just watch Shall We Dance?, by Richard Gere and I felt that I made a right choice by dancing because I AM indeed happier when I'm dancing..But now, my problem is that I NEED A PARTNER!!!
I think that's the hardest part of it..I can't get a partner~Haiz, so sad..
Well, anyway..my boi went to play paintball with his riding kaki..
That is him in the picture..

its supposed to be up yesterday,bu everything's against me~~~
(grumbles)

我累了。。。

2006-04-07T23:47:00.000+08:00

我累了，真的累了。。。
我想每个人到了某一段时间都会有这种想法吧。就像我一样，我天天都得工作，现已疲惫不堪，不想做任何的事了。我到底该怎么办？有谁能来告诉我？来教教我，此时此刻的我，到底怎么了？该做些设么？我想我是疯了吧。。。
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well, I was thinking of getting a haircut before school terms start once again..should I keep my fringe? Or should I keep it short? I'll look more mature with a long fringe,and I'll look a little jap with a short finge..So any aomments? I was hoping to get it done by the next week, if possible..

That's it, my boi & his riding buddies are having fun, I'm here, rotting at home..What a nice day... ...

my off day's gone..

2006-04-07T17:31:00.001+08:00

I last had my off day on last monday, seems decades ago to ME but, what can I do right, life goes on..Well anyway, over the past 1 week plus, so many things have happened..I've come to realise that human are basically selfish by nature, their selfishness level depends on the environment that they grow up with and work with through their whole life.
Just last week, I realized that those men over at my work place have got no balls..Most of them fall under the penisless category, those that would volunteer to help me are not around, then those that are around just act deaf, you talk to them, they just walk away, as though you're not there..
Fark them lahz!!! That day, I carried 5 CARTONS OF 1.5L MINERAL WATER!!!Do you know that just 1 farking carton is heavy enough and I have to carry 5 farking cartons of it..I ask them to help they walk away, act busy..I curse those ball-les creatures to get their karma when the clock strikes 12 tonight. I curse those ball-less creatures to have no kids of their own. I curse their children(if they have) to have no children at all!!! Last but not least, I will curse them with all my heart that their children( as I've said, if they have) to treat the the same way they treat others [just like how they treat me!!]..

Now, I umm...I ummm.. Oh sharks!! I can't remember what I wanna tell again...GGRRrrrr..No choice, gotta stop now..wait till I've got time and my mind is back to functioning properly..till then..

This is my day off~

2006-03-28T00:14:00.000+08:00

Its my only day off this week and guess what..I've got 1 cut, 2 bruises and 3 mosquito bites..Is this what you get for resting at home and NOT going out on a rainy day?!?
duhz
anyway, I chance upon this picture and I pretty much like it..

That's a fallen angel too...