It's nice!!!

I just watch Take The Lead with my boy..
It's so nice...Super nice..Strongly recommended..I'm still excited..I'm still feeling so high with all the dance moves, the everything in the show..OMG..I think other than latin, I'm gonna take ballroom as well..HaHa..

I don't know what to do...

Firstly, my original plan was to take part in the 2-dance category of the dancesport exam, but its seems to be unachievable..If I reallly wanna do that, I'll have to do private lesson twice each week...And I'll have to pay another hundred odd bucks, the exam costs 8pounds, which is about SGD$15...So I'm already so broke, its not a possible option..Felt my dream shattered by reality once again...

Secondly, I didn't mean to throw tantrum, I just felt a little frustration rising in me, I have got totally no idea what's wrong with me..I guess I'm just tired..Partly because I'm gonna work from 9am to 10.30pm every Saturday, I obviously know that I no longer enjoy working there with all those low-down rodent, despicable creep, but I've got no choice. I need a job, I need an income, I need to pay for my school textbooks, I need to pay for my school fees, I need some pocket money, I need to keep up with my dance..

my granny..

Recently. I brought my granny to the doctor as she's having a little cough and a little flu..My heart ache for her~She's a super duper nice lady. She's nice to everyone she meet, she's nice to all the little kids in the neighbourhood, she's nice to all the neighbours, but she's now senile..It breaks my heart to see her like this. I used to love going over to her place after school ends, I used to like satying there till like 10pm at night before going home, I used to stay there when I was very young, before I went to school, I'm her most doted grandchild, but nowadays, when I visit her, she doesn't recognize me...
I just went up to my granny's house two days back, she ask me the same question again. my aunt always answer on my behalf, I always feel an urge to cry whenever she ask that question. I know she didn't want this to happen as well, but I just couldn't help it.. So now, it becomes a routine that after I visit her, I'll hide somewhere and cry a little before proceeding to other stuff.. If ever a fairy comes and ask if I have any wish, I'll definitely ask her to cure my granny.. Even if I have to sacrifice mine in return, I wouldn't consider even for another second..
Right now, I'll tried to keep myself as busy as possible to escape the cruelty of reality.. I can't imagine the day when my granny finally has to leave me..I don't dare to imagine.. I'm not brave enough to even think about it... ...

A New Chapter..(cont'd)

I think from my current changes, I'm considering a revamp of my wardrobe..But I'll need some financial support on that operation..If I have a sponsor that will pay for all my clothes, I think I'll definitely revamp my wardrobe..Plus, I think I'm gonna change my glasses to plastic frame as I'm currently using metal ones..In that way, I'll look totally nerdy..(which is my intention to ward off those buggers at my workplace)

Now, my new target is to get a distinction for my dance on 21 May 2006..It is a big event for me as I'm a first timer..I'm already down on the nervous system when the event is like a month away..OMG~~How am I gonna cope~~

A New Chapter..

I've got my new phone, I've got my hair chopped, I've got a new semester ahead of me..HAIZZZzzzz

new phone..
new hair..
new semester..
new classmates..

HAIZzzz

I WANNA WATCH TAKE THE LEAD!!!

OMG!! Look at this..I wanna watch Take The Lead!!!

I've got it...

Can you all see it? This is my new phone, I just got it last night..Not bad hor? Eugene help me find 1. See, expert come out only, result also different sia..HaHa..
I just tell him 2 days ago that I'm looking for a new phone because my previous 1 is dying, its got rheumatism(it gets a little crazy on rainy days)..Then I rush down to get the very next day...Fast hor?!?!
Gene, thanks arhz, next time let you play my sonic k? *smiles*

OK, now that I've got a new phone, I'm gonna get my hair cut liaoz..HeHe..
Bye~my hair..Bye~ my freaking Nokia 7200(I spent nearly 1k on that dumb phone)

updates..

After waking up from my beauty slp of 5 hours, I can tell that I'm now emotionally stable. I wonder why, has it been like that all along or just started recently..I realize that there's a handful of uncles keep coming up to me and talk to me(to me,all above 30s are classified as uncle liaoz)..No matter how I ignore them, they still find something to talk about..Kinda irritating..But never mind, 'cause my job includes smiling at them as well, so I'm just being professional..

Sorry, your appeal has...

NOT BEEN APPROVED
Haiz..This is the dunno 3rd or 4th time I'm appealing to upload just a pathetic module..Previously, I appeal twice to upload blaw, now I've already appealed twice to upload managing e-commerce...
I thought I don't care..but why are my tears running down my cheeks?!?Why doesn't my tears stop?!?When will my tears stop running?!?It simply doesn't stop..
Of all the time, they called in the midst of my work..The sadder I am, the more I will smile, the broader my smile will become..The more I smile, the more I feel like crying..I hate my job..
Of all days, why today?!?!I feel so pathetic..

Why are you not there when I needed you most? You said you know, I told you about it, but you still are not there..Why am I hugging myself, why ain't you there for me?

wicked driver..

I've been thinking for a very long time, should I or should I not get my license? I've seen so so so many bu-doh(dim-witted) drivers on the road..Just yesterday, I saw this idiot pulling off stunts, drive BMW 1 somemore..So what they are rich..Just some brainless bastards(or bitch) showing some rattling metal nia mahz..so hao lian for what..Later crash into the curb then I'll be eating popcorn and laugh arhz..So fed up with these people, then last night, I saw a bus stopping in the center lane of the road, then got 1 person lying on the ground, not far from the man is a bicycle..Haiz..life's short, really..
Today, when I was coming home(it's raining monkeys & elephants), then of course any one in the right mind would go by the sheltered way. Then this basTARD stop his car below the shelter. So I'm wet, then this bastard still stare at me, then I look back lohz..It's like, why you stare at me like that, huh..My face got money izzit..Or you got see words on my face huh.. Farking asshole..BRainless bastard..

Period

Next, today at work, the store manager like kenna possessed sia..
This morning, he went back to the store to buy some BBQ chicken. He returned within an hour, went straight to the department and started barking like a mad dog at the staff..For all that I've been told, he's been told to get the chickens for the easter celebration..For all that I've known, he's hen-pecked(one of those with no balls)..So i guessed his master(wife) must have scolded him, that's why he went back to thw store to scold the staff..He even used words like 'bastard'..He's a manager, he scolded in such language, what's worse, he did it IN THE PUBLIC, WHERE ALL CUSTOMERS CAN SEE AND HEAR WHAT IS GOING ON!!! Now, I personally think that HE is the bastard..He's incorrigible, he even wanted to issue warning letter to the staff..He bears grudges, he's using his authority to get back on the staff on personal feud..He's abusing his power..
That is why I never would wanna obey their so-called rules..that's why I never compromise with their request..

This is my favourite song..

听说南方从来不曾有寂寞
听说在海边 世界没有尽头

你哭着告诉我你和他梦想的种种
我会是你雨天的湖泊 拥抱你的温柔

好想看你的笑容 对离开的他说
你心中那份美丽怎么找都不会再有

静静触摸未来遥远的风 有一天你会找回你的梦
幸福是看得透而不是舍不得他的所有

慢慢触摸天空暖暖的火 我在这天黑了也不会走
你的快乐除了他还有我永远守候
不要难过

听说冬天叶子瘦了会脸红
听说在天空 有迷人的星座

一起去探险吧也许你会喜欢而感动
你沉默的时候我知道 你的心还很痛

真想看你的笑容 对你的他大声说
你心中那份美丽怎么找都不会再有

if any1 interested to know the translated version, let me know, I'll get it done asap..

I thought...

I thought I'm healthy, but I'm not..
I thought I'm decisive, but I'm not..
I thought I'm strong, but I'm not..
I thought I could handle problems on my own, but I can't..
I thought I'm financially independent, but I'm not..
I realize that I'm not what I thought I am to be..
I'm a nobody, I can accomplish nothing..
I can mess up even the simplest task, such as studies..
What can I do in the future...
What am I suppose to do after I graduate...
I'm left with only one year now...

There goes, my nerves are not functioning normally again..

giie~where are you~~

GIIE!!! What have you been doing?? Do you know that peggy has been bad mounthing you all the while that you are not around??? That bitch is really so annoying that the promoters hated her, the jollibean auntie hated her, the sushi auntie hated her as well..Then she always 不懂装懂，假厉害...That's the bad news, the good news is that Doreen is gone!!!(applause)She's been transfered to another outlet, I think they mention bugis if not mistaken...

I just reach home not very long ago, about ten minutes earlier, then my mum was talking to my younger sister.
M(mom): so you go his(YZ,her bf) house again huh..
S(her): umm..
M: then you go there yourself or he come and pick you up
S: go myself
M: then just now he got send you back
S: I come back myself
M: he play enough already dump aside liao huh
S: (quiet) no lah

See that, so stupid also have...haiz.. Really is 来者不拒 arhz
Heck care lahz, so long as he don't come and disturb me can liao..

I really don't like this guy lohz..When he first know my sister, its only like last december, then by january,he's frequently found in my home, what's worse, he's always in my room, even at night..
This is what I've been bearing with all these months...So when he's at my place, I'll avoid it till he left, sometimes he leave only after 11pm..Then I can't go home lohz...When I'm at home, he'll try means and ways to talk to me, we obviously have got absolutely NOTHING in common to talk about..God knows what he's up to..

I don't actually like very long posts, but no choice..haha..

I guess I'm getting out of my mind..

Alright, I went down to the school today to upload my module again...Hehehe, this time I never use the "realise my mistake and I will work harder" trick liao, this time I use "determination"... Smart right, must change strategy mahz, one don't work, then try another one lohz.. Where there's a will, there's a way..

These are the teams that went for the paintball session with my boi..

ARGHZZZZZzzz~~~~

ARGHZZZZZZZZZzzzzz!!!!! FARK THAT FARKING SCHOOL FOR THAT!!!~!

This is the don't know how many donkey times I've appeal to upload just 1 stupid module..

URGHZZZZZZZzzzzz

I HATE THEM!!!THEY SUCK BIG TIME!!!
SO THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR STUDYING HARD HUH!?!?!
SO THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR BEING MISS NICE HUH?!?!
SO THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR GOING BY THE BOOKS HUH?!?!

FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!FARK!!!

how's your day today?

OK..Today, I requested to have a break, I'm really really tired already, I slept half my day away..I don;t know what I have been doing, I just watch Shall We Dance?, by Richard Gere and I felt that I made a right choice by dancing because I AM indeed happier when I'm dancing..But now, my problem is that I NEED A PARTNER!!!
I think that's the hardest part of it..I can't get a partner~Haiz, so sad..
Well, anyway..my boi went to play paintball with his riding kaki..
That is him in the picture..


its supposed to be up yesterday,bu everything's against me~~~
(grumbles)

我累了。。。

我累了，真的累了。。。
我想每个人到了某一段时间都会有这种想法吧。就像我一样，我天天都得工作，现已疲惫不堪，不想做任何的事了。我到底该怎么办？有谁能来告诉我？来教教我，此时此刻的我，到底怎么了？该做些设么？我想我是疯了吧。。。
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well, I was thinking of getting a haircut before school terms start once again..should I keep my fringe? Or should I keep it short? I'll look more mature with a long fringe,and I'll look a little jap with a short finge..So any aomments? I was hoping to get it done by the next week, if possible..

That's it, my boi & his riding buddies are having fun, I'm here, rotting at home..What a nice day... ...

my off day's gone..

I last had my off day on last monday, seems decades ago to ME but, what can I do right, life goes on..Well anyway, over the past 1 week plus, so many things have happened..I've come to realise that human are basically selfish by nature, their selfishness level depends on the environment that they grow up with and work with through their whole life.
Just last week, I realized that those men over at my work place have got no balls..Most of them fall under the penisless category, those that would volunteer to help me are not around, then those that are around just act deaf, you talk to them, they just walk away, as though you're not there..
Fark them lahz!!! That day, I carried 5 CARTONS OF 1.5L MINERAL WATER!!!Do you know that just 1 farking carton is heavy enough and I have to carry 5 farking cartons of it..I ask them to help they walk away, act busy..I curse those ball-les creatures to get their karma when the clock strikes 12 tonight. I curse those ball-less creatures to have no kids of their own. I curse their children(if they have) to have no children at all!!! Last but not least, I will curse them with all my heart that their children( as I've said, if they have) to treat the the same way they treat others [just like how they treat me!!]..

Now, I umm...I ummm.. Oh sharks!! I can't remember what I wanna tell again...GGRRrrrr..No choice, gotta stop now..wait till I've got time and my mind is back to functioning properly..till then..